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29.10.2020

ADDICT

Death will only separate us,
But that stage is already in the past.
The new level has been opened:
I wish I could get some praise
For the the things that I've done~
Let's forget about the overdoze,
And agonizing comatoze.
Yup, I'm that selfish~
Here, the only idea is that
A fuckin' whore shoudn't be sober.
 
This is my mantra,
This is my life,
And you're gonna play
With it till the dawn.
The fire surrounds me,
Burning me to the ashes,
Within, there's both heavenly bliss and a helluva high feeling.
 
I'm addicted, I'm obsessed,
The hotel has become my Atlantis.
There will be a new fucking excuse to sin, as always,
To make a breath and feel yourself alive again.
I'm addicted, I'm burning out,
Yet again flying away, being so high.
This feeling is even better than the friggin' drugs,
Just follow it and let your inner demons rule.
 
Here it is – love,
It keeps pulling you down so low.
Your time will come,
And the images of death will flash in the rain.
One can't change themselves~
And what if I get outta control?
I've chosen the thorny path.
That's the truth of mine~
Then, would you be brave enough
To say we're just friends?
 
That's exactly what you'll do,
Just don't lie to me.
Everything could have become
Ours before the dawn.
Your money and power,
My sensual drive,
Within, there's both heavenly bliss and a helluva high feeling.
 
I'm addicted, I'm obsessed,
The hotel has become my Atlantis.
There will be a new fucking excuse to sin, as always,
To make a breath and feel yourself alive again.
I'm addicted, I'm burning out,
Yet again flying away, being so high.
This feeling is even better than the friggin' drugs,
Just follow it and let your inner demons rule.
 
Just follow it and let your inner demons rule.
 
I'm addicted, I'm burning out,
Yet again flying away, being so high.
This feeling is even better than the friggin' drugs,
Just follow it and let your inner demons rule.
 
***
 
I'm addicted, I'm suffering,
I'm no longer feeling high by the morning,
Yet again, I'm poisoning my veins to overcome sorrow.
It's hard to distinguish between pleasure and pain.
 
I'm addicted, I'm so weak,
Broken on the inside, stylish on the outside,
I know my life has been going the wrong way for the long time.
Maybe, things will become different in their Hotel of Kindness.
 
19.02.2019

My song

I've tried to hide my pain, I was running away.
I've tried to seek my place for forgetting myself.
A grey sky above my head.
In fog I cannot find my way.
 
Smiling to our faces they talk behind our backs
and betray that who trust in them.
Is it really a human nature:
why do you live by lies, breaking hearts?
 
The day after the night, sunrise will come again
and I with my song will come in a new day.
If you're feeling blue or alone,
or you shed the silent tears
this is a sign you still exist.
 
In my eyes there is a sign:
I'm alive, you hear me again:
I'm eternally grateful for the wonderful
chance to be born.
 
If you have a dream: the painfully dear dream
that is not given to achieve by reality -
it's a reason that we must
keep reaching to light
 
Suspense waits for me at the door to nowhere.
Forgetting fear, I hold out my hand.
 
To all those, who are falling on knees
To all those, who are weak and lost
Just believe in yourself, I gift to you my song.
 
In my eyes there is a sign:
I'm alive, you hear me again:
I'm eternally grateful, The Cruel World,
that you made possible this meeting.
 
19.02.2018

Copycat [Imitator]

“Well, hello”
Whom are you talking to?
I’m not acquainted with you
“I gotta go
We’ll meet again”
Day by day
My will becomes weaker
 
It's so good to be together…
I’m telling you everything you want to hear
“Just think how funny it is:
It’s like I’m looking in a mirror”
 
I no longer remember whom I was
There will be haze in the eyes…
 
I'll adjust myself to you.
It’s much easier, right?
Make me erase my face –
I’ll learn to feel no pity for myself
 
Tell me whom I should be
 
Tell me whom I should be
 
“Well, hello.
Is there something wrong?”
I’m speaking the exact way you do
That’s it, I’ll dissolve
And become nobody,
Just like you wanted
 
Icy cold tone of voice again –
But why, let me understand?
“Just think how funny it is:
I’ve been waiting for your tears for a long time”
 
I no longer remember whom I was
There will be haze in the eyes…
 
I’ve become a fake –
The one whom you wanted, right?
I’ve managed to erase my face,
Having learnt to feel no pity for myself
 
Tell me whom I should be (x4)
 
The cage has suddenly closed,
With no mercy and no avail…
I wonder, what are you going to do now?
Tell me, and you’d better be honest…
 
I no longer remember whom I was
There will be haze in the eyes…
 
I’ve become a fake –
The one whom you wanted, right?
I’ve managed to erase my face,
Having learnt to feel no pity for myself
 
Tell me whom I should be (x8)
 
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