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A ditty

Versions: #1
From the forest come out riding
Mounted Police
Common Girls get into doggy position
Time to practice
 
I arrived in the collective
name Michurina
and I know I will be fucked
my heart felt it coming.
 
Passing mother in laws house
I never go without some fun
One time show my d**k
Another time I moon them!
 
Went up north
to dig for gold
If not for my pu**y
I'd drop dead from hunger
 
(Ref 1:)
Hey Hey green wall
Girls f**ed the priest that's what he deserved!
 
(Interlude)
On the bridge stood a man
Mother-f***ing looking guy
No way to avoid him
He appeared, f*** me
 
Fell in love with a guy
But he has no d**k
F**k do I need one without a d**k?
With d**k its f***ing great!
 
In the suburbs
the nightingale f**ks the cuckoo
Loudly on the branches you hear:
'Chirp, p***y, d**k, cuckoo!'
 
With my sweetie near the station
We were kissing till the morning.
Would be kissing even more,
But vagina hurts.
 
(Ref 1:)
Hey Hey green wall
Girls f**ed the priest that's what he deserved!
 
(INTERLUDE)
Girls were swimming in a pond,
Found a rubber d**k.
F***ed themsleves all day,
Didn't even go to school!
 
My dear under a fence
Found a wooden c**k.
Everyone tried it out -
But it didn't fit!
 
From the forest from the mountains
A man showed off his axe.
But he did't just show it:
He tied it to his d**k!
 
My and my sweet were making out,
Standing on our tippy toes.
I stood and peed
On his white boots!
 
(REF 2:)
Hey, Hey , ass and vagina became one!
How impossible there should be a break from one to the next!
 
(interlude)
Manny had her virginity taken,
Sasha got f***ed in the ass.
Then we we crapped into the piano,
What a lovely time we had!
 
We were f**-ing with my sweetie
In the freezing cold.
My ass was covered in frost,
But my d**k was up like Santa Claus.
 
Near the main bridge in Voronezh,
A church was looted.
The priest was f**ed in the ass
And they crapped in the bell tower!
 
I was going down
On Sergei Brown
He looks sweet,
But tastes salty!
 
(Ref 1:)
Hey Hey green wall
Girls f**ed the priest that's what he deserved!
 
(INTERLUDE)
 
Tomatoes, Tomatoes,
Tomatoes, vegetables!
P***y rides on the horse,
D**k in the ambulance!
 
Fell in love with d**k
And hung his picture on my wall.
Woke up in the morning:
D**k is hanging, and my wine is gone!
 
With my buddy
We were working on the truck.
Were dumbasses:
Our fuel was stolen!
 
Fell in love with a tractor driver
and you know what.
Couldn't wash off my boobs for 3 weeks
And kept peeing diesel oil!
 
(Ref 1:)
Hey Hey green wall
Girls f**ed the priest that's what he deserved!
 
(INTERLUDE)
My dear girlfriend farts for me through the walkie talkie:
'Without the password, its like without menstruation.
 

The Third Aria of Ivan

Versions: #2
(spoken)
Eventually, our Ivan the Good Guy reached Koschei's place,
Came to his castle, yelled 'Come here, villain!'
And Koschei appeared in front of him, said 'Hey!
You, Ivan, crossed the border and trespassed my territory!'
Ivan came to him, took out his sword, sawed-off shotgun, gat.
Having drunk a big jug of vodka, he told these words:
 
'Hey, dude, you make a mistake when you offended me,
You, shithead, will be crapping for three days because of fear,
I'mma cut your balls off and gouge your blinkers out,
You, dickhead, will remember me for a long time,
I'mma castrate you with my kladenets1,
You, asshole, will say 'good-bye' to your dick,
Come here, mud duck, we're gonna fight each other,
That'll be face to face, face to face,
Face to face, face to face!
 
Bam! Get some strikes, jackass!
Bam! Get some strikes, jackass!
 
Why have you snatched my beautiful fiancée?
I'mma break your skull and piss on your brain,
I'mma tear your ass like a German cross,
You're gonna see that I ain't lying,
Hey, thin motherfucker, there's no sence to howl so loudly,
You're gonna see how I can kill my enemies,
I'mma piss all over you and trample your nose,
You, cocksucker, will see that I ain't joking!
 
Bam! Get some strikes, jackass! (x6)
 
(spoken)
Ivan began hitting motherfucker Koschei to kill!
He fucking kicked his enemy in the ugly mug and struck on the balls, too.
And when he got tired of kicking, he ran to find his wife,
And, being screwed up, Koschei immidiately crawled to the bushes.
 

• 1. Kladenets - in Rusian folklore, it is a mythical sword that has magic power and provides victory over enemies.

The Aria of Ivan and the Frog

Versions: #2
All fucked-up, fucked-up, fucked-up! (x3)
 
I've been going throw forests and looking for my arrow everywhere,
And what is this fucking creature sitting on the leaf?
It's completely green and cold piece of shit,
And it's holding my arrow in its arms
Like a joint of marijuana,
Well, what should I do? Where could I find a fiancee?
And why are you croaking, fuck your mother?
 
'You take me with you, I will be your wife!'
'What, must I take you?' 'Yes, me!'
'I'd rather jump headfirst into the deep swamp!'
 
'You take me with you, I will be your wife,
I will be faithful for you, I am a happiness of your fate!'
 
All fucked-up, fucked-up, fucked-up! (x3)
 
'Holy shit! It ain't a happiness! How must I find that?
You, stupid frog, better tell me how we will sleep together!
Well, sex with you will be a myth,
'Cause you even can't fit for my fuckpole,
You'll burst like a condom!'
 
'Well, fuck off and die! If you don't wanna, don't take me,
But remember, my dear, let a frog tear you into small pieces,
If you return back without a woman, you father
Will fucking beat you down, I answer for my words!'
 
'Yes, of course, the King will really hit me,
I can't deny it, but, eventually,
Listen to me, green shit, I wanna tell you:
It's better for me to get some strikes in my ear or jaw,
But I will be single, I will live so as I want to do!'
 
'You take me with you, I will be your wife,
I will be faithful for you, I am a happiness of your fate!'
 
All fucked-up, fucked-up, fucked-up! (x3)
 
'Actually, that's not so bad,
Somehow, my dick is itching,
I think I'll take this amphibia to the castle,
I won't have to byu her any jewels and luxury clothes,
If I am drunk as a cunt, she won't yell at me,
Listen to me, green frog, I agree!
Come here! You will be my fiancee!'
'Really?' 'No shit! You sit on my handkerchief
And let's go home with me. Have you climbed up, dear?'
'Yes, I have. I'm fine, darling!'
 
You have taken me home, I will be your wife,
I will be faithful for you, I am a happiness of your fate!'
 
All fucked-up, fucked-up, fucked-up! (x3)
 
'I have taken her home, she will be my wife,
She'll be faithful for me... I've got a fucking happiness of my fate!..'
 
All fucked-up, fucked-up, fucked-up! (x3)
 
(Narrative Part)
 
So Ivan took the frog,
Put her in his pocket,
The frog nearly died there,
'Cause there was a bad smell going from Ivan.
 
Then Ivan came to the King,
He had overgrown hair like a hermit,
The King asked Ivan:
'How's your health? How's your wife?'
'Look at, father, I've brought my wife,
I am keeping well, Jesus saves me,
Although I've got the diarrhea
Because of the musty swamp water!
Here is she, my wife!
Yeah, she is green,
But I have a perspective
That I won't have a damned mother-in-law!'
'Okay, Ivan, don't be sad,
Zip your fuckpole forever,
I bless you,
If you are so goon!'
 
Ivan went to his room,
Put the frog on the table,
Began to view the frog
And scratch his dick.
 
'Well, how must I fuck her?
Shit, fuck your mother,
My dear, you at least fart
So I will be able to find a hole in you!'
 
At that moment, the frog
Gave a heart-rending shout,
Somersaulted through herself,
And a lady appeared in front of him,
The frog became to a nice chick
From her head to her cunt,
She was very beautiful,
Everyone would fall in love with her.
 
Feeling a lot of pleasure,
Ivan pissed in his pocket.
Loudly releasing gas,
He immediately ran to the toilet,
Having opened his jaws like a crocodile,
He took frog's skin.
And, farting loudly,
He flushed it down the toilet.
 
Suddenly thunder struck,
So Ivan's house became shaking,
His wife disappeared,
It was a big bummer,
But, on the other side of the window,
She managed to shout
'Koschei has stolen me,
Help me out before I die'
 
Ivan was grieving for three days,
Then, having saddled a horse,
He went for a long way,
Loudly ringing with his harness...
 

The Cabernet (The Second Ariya of Ivan)

Versions: #2
Cherries have ripened in Uncle Vanya's garden,
In Uncle Vanya's garden, cherries have ripened,
And now uncle Vanya and aunt Grunya are in a bathhouse,
In late afternoon, we went out as if for a walk.
 
That afternoon, we were sitting and demure drinking,
The Cabernet was little by little filling our entrails,
Suddenly Pet'ka from next door quietly hinted
That cherries have ripened in Uncle Vanya's garden,
We didn't know, we didn't know anything about it,
And we were drinking, we drank the Cabernet,
At that time, in Uncle Vanya's garden, cherries were ripening,
They even became a little overripe.
 
Cabernet, Caberhet, Cabernet, nau! (x3)
Drink quickly, the cherries have become overripe!
 
We crushed a box of bottles and went on the job,
A thought came into my head
That we can quickly rob the neighbor's garden
Until the cherries become overripe there.
At home, we changed our pants
So that they wouldn't be torn on our asses,
So that it would be easier to climb trees,
If I fucking lied, I would be an asshole, really.
 
Mum, prepaire patches,
Mum, prepaire needles,
Mum, don't yell at me so long,
'Cause we have decided
To take a walk in the village.
 
Cabernet, Caberhet, Cabernet, nau! (x3)
Aw, yeah!
Cabernet, Caberhet, Cabernet, nau! (x3)
Drink quichly, and let's go on the job!
 
We still had to walk a little distantion,
There were two houses which we had to go around,
Pet'ka, motherfucker, asshole, be quiet, keep your voice down,
Here is Uncle Vanya's garden, in front of us!
Guys, climb quieter,
Will we be seen, or not?!
'Maybe, anyone will see that we're breathing air'
Said this asshole Pet'ka carrying baskets.
 
Well, Pet'ka, bend down this branch!
He rained all cherries down to his shirt,
But he hung on the branch too much and broke it,
And he fell down together with the cherries. He was very angry.
 
Cabernet, Caberhet, Cabernet, nau! (x3)
Don't make noice with a glass, uncle Vanya can hear us!
 
Let uncle Vanya bathe aunt Grunya,
Let he has sex with her in a kolhoz bathhouse,
We say together: 'Thank you, aunt Grunya!'
And say to uncle Vanya: 'Thank you, uncle Vanya!'
 
But Uncle Vanya's dog didn't nap,
It didn't sleep and was aware of everything,
It, bitch, understood everything perfectly,
And it torn our pants and our asses.
 
Mum, we have torn our pants,
Mum, our asses have been torn,
We all overlooked the male dog,
Mum, we are badly hurt because of it.
Cabernet, Caberhet, Cabernet, nau! (x4)
Ah, Cabernet, nau! (x2)
Cabernet, nau! (x18)
 
(Narrative Part)
 
The King called his three sons,
Sternly looked at them from his eyebrows,
And then the petty King said:
'Today is your time to get married!
Wipe your snot on your fucking faces,
Each of you, take an arrow!
You all must go to the open country,
But don't go there in a Chevrolet.
You better ride horses,
It's more comfortable and humbler,
You all must shoot your arrow to the sky
And run for it,
And where your arrow will have flown
There will be your wife,
But don't fuck her right away,
Wait until it's getting dark...'
 
The sons began to ride their horses,
They went a fucking long way,
And shot every which way
To find a cunt for each of them.
 
Older brother's arrow
Has flown to a nobles' mansion:
And this arrow deep penetrated
In the ass of noble's daughter.
 
Making a loud squeak
Middle-brother's arrow
Hit merchant's daughter
Straight in her vagina.
 
The arrow of the youngest Ivan the Fool
Flew far away
And Ivan's arrow
Disappeared beyond the forests.
 
And Ivan hit the road,
He was diligently going like a ram,
Then he came on a swamp,
He became overgrown like a partisan:
 
'I am fucking tired to go,
I want to drink at least some water,
I should get the hair of the dog
After yesterday's booze...
Something is itching in my fucking groin,
Maybe I'll die very soon?!
My skull hurts, I can't help myself!
What is croaking here, in the bushes?'
 

A tale heard in the transportation depot

So I was on my way to delivering some gravel
in my old wreck of a
and I drove slowly, chatting with a chick
to which I gave a ride, just for the company.
I talked to her tenderly, like to a princess,
yet she must have weighted about 20 stones1.
Had she been working as a stewardess
the plane would never have lifted off the ground.
 
I said 'Bonjour madame merci l'amour toujours2 or something,
I would be delighted to know your name.'
And she said: 'Pardon me, my name is Nyurka3,
and what about yours? How should I call you?'
I told her I was Grisha4, also unmarried,
a lone traveller since young age,
and I added that I was pretty well-off,
with a plump wallet in my pocket5 for more than 30 years.
 
After a dozen kilometers or so,
I quietly stopped the GAZ-51 and told her
I had busted the [beep]ing shaft and we were up [beep] creek.
Then I quietly drove in neutral toward the forest.
She said: 'You're taking the piss, I bet the shaft is fine.
You just have something on your mind, but that's ok, I'm game'
And of course everyone around here knows I'm an adept [beep]er,
and I thought 'great, now she's all mine'.
 
I climbed onto her, but the cabin is pretty small, you see,
and her navel squeezed me right against the roof.
Out of breath, I said 'My dear Nyurka,
let's get out of here, I can't stand it any longer!'
We went to a forest patch, that was easy to find,
and she immediately forgot all about her, hmm, modesty.
I [beep]ed her blind6 and gave her six [beep]ing helpings!
 
She said: 'Exhausted already, you scoundrel?
Now I'll climb on top of you and squash you on the spot.
Come on, get a move on, why did you stop?
Faster, come on, shake it until I [beep]!'
I can endure quite a lot, but still I'm not her pig,
and I have an (appointment?) at half past five.
And then I said to myself: 'come on, driver Egorov,
give her a good [beep]ing and let her run away home.
I lifted her with difficulty and gave her (hell).
'Get lost, you [beep]' I shouted as she ran.
'Well, you wanted a good [beep],
but how many times is it possible? I went to 7 already.'
I walked back and happily sat in my cool truck
I reversed along the track and was back to the long road in no time,
and I laughed about the whole [beep]ing story as I drove,
thinking to myself those chicks were nothing but [beep].
 
Now listen further:
 
After delivering the gravel, I immediately went to the pub,
to get myself a good beer after a long ride.
But when I put my hand in my pocket, I immediately realized
my plump wallet was gone!
 
I am the GAZ driver!
 
- Come on Petrovich7, finish your story. Pour him another drink!
 
I am the GAZ driver!
 
- Petrovich is pissed! Pour him another!
- Another glass for Petrovich!
- Bring 'em up!
 
Now I will give an advice to all at the end of my story:
In order not to loose your wallet ever,
don't fool around with chicks nor stray into the forest,
and your wallet shall always stay with you!
 

• 1. 7 puds, which puts the girl's weight around 115 kg or 18 stones (rounded up for luck, making the poor girl about 10% heavier)
• 2. 'Hello miss thanks love always' in (broken) French
• 3. A diminutive of 'Anna'
• 4. A diminutive of 'Grigory'
• 5. 'my pocket had not been empty'
• 6. '(so hard) that my eyes went blurry'
• 7. His father's name, I guess. The full name must be Grigory Petrovich Egorov

The Song About a Shy Guy

One day, I went to dance with my girlfriend,
I was friends with her, it already was not the first day,
I confess I was tired from her too much,
I didn't even want to kiss her.
I confess I was tired from her too much,
I didn't even want to kiss her.
 
I am staying and looking around, she is by my side,
I didn't want it more than death,
And she is watching every my look,
She wants me to stop looking on other girls.
And she is watching every my look,
She wants me to stop looking on other girls.
 
Actually, I am a shy guy,
I am not looking on other girls because of her,
I am looking on the sky, the Moon, the stars,
I don't want to do it, but I please her with it.
I am looking on the sky, the Moon, the stars,
I don't want to do it, but I please her with it.
 
But, having given a cursory glance,
I randomly saw an another girl,
She was 100 times better than mine standing by my side,
And I thought 'Wow!'
She was 100 times better than mine standing by my side,
And I thought 'Wow!'
 
No one girl could match with her beauty of the face,
And her figure was the best here.
I thought 'It's good to be walking with so beautyful girl,
And it's no sin to kiss her'.
I thought 'It's good to be walking with so beautyful girl,
And it's no sin to kiss her'.
 
That girlfriend smiled at me
And winked at me so nicely.
Of course, I smiled at her too,
Because I have a talent for these things.
Of course, I smiled at her too,
Because I have a talent for these things.
 
But my cunt saw it,
Pushed me in my side, and told me:
'Don't cheat on me! I want you never to do so things like this!
My heart hurts because of you!
Don't cheat on me! I want you never to do so things like this!
My heart hurts because of you!'
 
'If you try again to look at her,
I will beat you and her down too much!
Then you will forget about all things in the world!
Anyway, I will be able to see how both of you look at each other!
Then you will forget about all things in the world!
Anyway, I will be able to see how both of you look at each other!'
 
But I thought with my chump:
'What is this shit? She ain't my wife!'
And told her very rude:
'Listen to me, bitch, now I'll fucking hit you, and you'll fall down!'
And told her very rude:
'Listen to me, bitch, now I'll fucking hit you, and you'll fall down!'
 
I became very angry like a tiger,
I told her: 'Fuck you!'
Then I came to that nice girl
And began to dance a slow waltz with her.
Then I came to that nice girl
And began to dance a slow waltz with her.
 
Then we were friends during all night
And were kissing in the silence of the night.
We were much happy together,
Then I was friends only with her.
We were much happy together,
Then I was friends only with her.
 
But if I remember about my previous horrible girlfriend,
I begin to feel a lot of anger.
She's a crud, a piece of shit, a bitch, a cocksucker, and a brute!
Well, then everything is vice versa.
She's a crud, a piece of shit, a bitch, a cocksucker, and a brute!
Well, then everything is vice versa!
 
Guys, I give you an advice: you should be friends
With this girl, with that girl, and with another girl,
Change them until you are married,
Otherwise, you will cry 'Oh, my God!'
Change them until you are married,
Otherwise, you will cry 'Oh, my God!'
 

Aria of Koschei the Immortal

Versions: #2
Have you ever heard how people give a cunt1?
No, it's not that cunt that has hairs,
U-u-u-ugh! It's a cunt, a specific cunt,
When they punch and kick you!
 
Ivan has just beaten me so much,
It was very disagreeable even for me,
I guess it's a custom among them
To kick right on the fucking face.
 
Probably now I'm going to die
From so intense battering...
Take your hat off! Koschei has got a cunt2, u-u-u-ugh!
I have got it for the soul, not for the glory!
 
Probably now I'm going to die
From so intense battering...
Take your hat off! Koschei has got a cunt, u-u-u-ugh!
I have got it for the soul, not for the glory!
 
(Narrative Part)
 
Koschei whined like a dog, farted several times and croaked,
He didn't stay alive, fuck him! Having crapping up his pants, he died.
And, shaking his ass, Ivan had been running across the chambers
Before he met his wife in one room.
Having seen Vasilisa, he took out his dick
And fucking fell down on the sofa with his wife,
After that, singing 'boogie-woogie', our wedded pair
Quickly went home,
Hugging with a pleasure!
 

• 1. 'Give a cunt' - it means 'to beat up' in Russian non-normative slang.
• 2. 'Has got a cunt' - it means 'has been beaten up' in Russian non-normative slang.

A cattleman

I was an ugly guy in our village,
Nature didn't give me any man's beauty,
When my parents were making me,
My father had been much drunk as a pig.
 
And I was born lame and humpbacked,
I have had a crooked mouth and a hunchbacked head,
When I went to work or home,
All hillbillies usually laughed at me.
 
(INTERLUDE)
 
In my kolkhoz, I worked a cattleman,
Cows were crazy about me,
Because I loved my dear cows,
I cared for them, and I fed them on time.
 
And I spent the nights with my cows on the farm,
I had sex with every my cow,
What could I do if I was ugly
And girls always ran away from me?
 
Oh, you, my dear cows!
I carefully milked you by your tits,
When I gave peace to my soul with any cow,
This cow was better for me than any woman.
 
(INTERLUDE)
 
(SOLO)
 
A had my own harem like a sultan,
I had sex with the cows, and it was fine for me,
For doing it, I set a stool behind a cow
And gave pleasure to all the cows.
 
But my intimate life was short,
One day, the chairman caught me red-handed.
There is the Article for it in the Criminal Code,
And I will go to prison.
 
Now the prison is my home,
And cows can't write me a letter,
Now bulls fuck my cows,
And I masturbate with my fists.
 

Love in afterlife

Again I eagerly wait for the end of Octobre,
I don't eagerly wait for the end of Octobre in vain -
You will come to me on the 31st night again,
Being mixed deadly again - loving shudder,
you will come, come from your grave.
 
Our bodies will merge again in the moonlight,
Our eternal love, we really need each other,
Your skill smiles at me again,
I will tenderly caress you on full moon.
 
Long ago you died for everyone, only not for me,
Let your beautiful corpse stink for a few years,
Worms have eaten our rotten flesh,
We - are sinful people, the Lord has not taken our souls,
I need your dead flesh.
 
Our bodies will merge again in the moonlight,
Our eternal love, we really need each other,
Your skill smiles at me again,
I will tenderly caress you on full moon.
 
Over the cemetery shines the big moon again,
You have no idea how much I nedd you, honey,
It's cozy for us in the family tomb with you together,
In the light we will make a [small] skeleton with you,
there will be three of us in the tomb.
 
Our bodies will merge again in the moonlight,
Our eternal love, we really need each other,
Your skill smiles at me again,
I will tenderly caress you on full moon.
 
Our bodies will merge again in the moonlight,
Our eternal love, we really need each other,
Your skill smiles at me again,
I will tenderly caress you on full moon.
I will tenderly caress you on full moon.
I will tenderly caress you on full moon.
 
:~)

A maggot

Versions: #2
Grubs (they are my brothers)
Have settled in apples,
But life in the apples is fucked up,
My relatives is living here, in the shit.
 
I borned here, and I was growing here,
The dung nurtured me,
On the surface, I am detestable,
I am a maggot, white worm.
 
(REF)
There is the mixture from dirt and shit. It's my motherland!
This mixture from dirt and shit is my motherland!
There is the mixture from dirt and shit. It's my motherland!
This mixture from dirt and shit is my motherland!
 
(INTERLUDE)
 
There are a lot of kinds
Of worms and insects here.
They are fleas, louses, and grubs.
They are my compatriots.
 
Hey, y'all, my brothers-worms!
Let's go to live in toilets,
Your life in the apples is very narrow,
'Cause let's come and join us in the shit!
 
(REF)
 
One day, a fisherman (he is so asshole)
Baited me and my brother,
And he threw the hook with us in the lake,
Well, we will die with honor!
 
I am not sorry about my soul,
But only other maggots know
That I died like a hero,
And I didn't betray my dung!
 
(REF)
 
(Throat Singing)
 

Junkie

The clock struck for the fortieth time,
A cuckoo comes out screaming,
We prick our veins, each hourly chime,
'Though I saw it in a coffin.
 
The needle jabs me right in the heart,
The deathly pill presses me down,
Like the sun, the joint burns my eyes hard
And the red poppy grinds me down to sand.
 
Who's screaming in the dense forest,
The goblin's up early, I guess.
I'll sharpen up my scythe for this,
'Though I admit I just don't care.
 
The needle jabs me right in the heart,
The deathly pill presses me down,
Like the sun, the joint burns my eyes hard
And the red poppy grinds me down to sand.
 
Between my eyes, a joint appeared,
Leaving an Indian symbol there.
I close my castle's doors in fear,
In my syringe, the red poppy gets bled.
 
The needle jabs me right in the heart,
The deathly pill presses me down,
Like the sun, the joint burns my eyes hard
And the red poppy grinds me down to sand.
 

From what?

What are, what are, what are
Our boys made of?1
Our boys are made from:
Knifes and brass knuckles, sawed-off shotguns and pistols!
 
What are, what are, what are
Our girls made of?
Our girls are made from:
Syphilises and brassieres, beauty, and blow job!
 
What is, what is, what is
'Sektor Gaza' band made of?
Sektor Gaza' band is made from:
Syringes, drugs, marijuana, bottles of vodka and grasses!
 

• 1. This song is a parody of Soviet children song 'Neposedyi - Iz chevo zhe sdelany nashyi mal'chishki' (Eng. 'What what are our boys made of?')

Dancing after sex

What a beautiful night and stars! This is a pleasure!
The drive flows from the disco hall,
And we are together, you are very nice today,
You tell me: 'Let's go to dance!'
But take your time! Fuck, we still have time!
Look here, today I have marijuana.
Smoke this a lot, I still have time,
Quickly finish smoking, let me to smoke like a locomotive1.
 
Because dancing after amoking, dancing after amoking,
Dancing after amoking is pleasure!
We came here around the corner,
You smoked too much marijuana,
But it should be this way, it necessarily gives the desired effect.
 
You tell me: 'Let's go to dance!'
But take your time! Fuck, we still have time!
Look here, today I have two bottles of moonshine.
Quickly drink this, I still have time,
The alcohol will warm us, hold a grass, now I'll pour for myself,
Because dancing, dancing, dancing after booze,
Because dancing, dancing, dancing after booze,
Because dancing, dancing, dancing after booze is pleasure!
 
Don't worry, today it all is my treat,
We are cool from wine and marijuana,
And we are drunk, me and you.
You tell me: 'Let's go to dance!'
But take your time! Fuck, we still have time!
 
Look there, I see bushes in that place.
- Ah! Ah!
- Quickly spread your legs!
- Ah! Ah!
- We will have time to dance!
- Ah! Ah!
- We enjoy wery well, don't be like a log.
 
Because dancing after sex, dancing after sex,
Dancing after sex is pleasure!
Because dancing after sex, dancing after sex,
Dancing after sex is pleasure!
Because dancing after sex, dancing after sex,
Dancing after sex is pleasure!
 

• 1. 'Smoke like a locomotive' - in the slang of drug addicts, it means taking a cigarette with a drug burning end in the mouth and start the smoke so that others can be tightened.

Plows-woogie

We are tractor drivers in the collective-farm, our profession is honorable,
We don't care about rock-and-roll, any punk or metalhead,
We hard work for all objectives
Of our Food Programme.
What's on your mind?
Maybe, is it a sound monitor or a amplifier?
You better listen the roar
Of our diesel engine,
Our tractor will sing us plows-woogie1
On the background of country-style view.
Yeah, we love plows-woogie, we love plows-woogie,
We love plows-woogie, we work with plows-woogie every day!
We are dirty like pigs,
But it is no problem,
Because we love our DT tractor2, and we can't live without it,
I poured the diesel oil in its collector
With native exhaust gas.
 
Yeah, we love plows-woogie, we love plows-woogie,
We love plows-woogie, we work with plows-woogie every day!
Though the urban guys call us as 'plows',
We don't care about this. They are fools themselves,
We are agricultural mechanics, and we live very well,
We all agree with the Perestroika, we will give a lot of bread for our country,
We support all speeches of the leader of the CPSU Gorbachev
Fom beginning to end.
 
Yeah, we love plows-woogie, we love plows-woogie,
We love plows-woogie, we work with plows-woogie every day!
 
Yeah, we love plows-woogie, we love plows-woogie,
We love plows-woogie, we work with plows-woogie every day!
 

• 1. 'Plows-woogie' is a parody of 'boogie-woogie'
• 2. DT is crawler of Soviet and Russian crawler tractors, Tractors of this series are produced in Volgograd Tractor Plant.
  
  

Faggot

Versions: #2
I grew up among girls, then my life went south
I tried on women's panties, though I didnt wear braids
I used to play with dolls, made embroidery with flowers
In general, I was an exemplary boy.
 
When I was 16 years old, I gave blowjobs to guys
Wasn't interested in girls, only in men
Then, getting fucked by some dude, a cop caught me in the act
I was condemned under Article 121. (1)
 
In jail I lived like a King, in every tract I was well known
As a cultured man and a good poof as well
Though I slept near the toilet chair, and it smelled like shit (2)
I really was the Queen of the entire jail
 
Got out of prison, and continued to put out for men,
Hello there, fellas! Pay attention to me
Even though I grew a beard, I'm a young horny goat
Hey man, hold up ! Let's do it in the butt
Even though I grew a beard, I'm a young butt pirate
Hey man, hold up ! Let's do it in the butt
Even though I grew a beard, I'm a young faggot
Hey man, hold up ! Let's do it in the butt
 
Translation Mine if no other Translation Source is given.

New Year's Song

For little girls
It's quite cold in winter.
From the streets, some girls
We took them home.
They lightened up, and warmed up,
Songs were sung to the guitar.
The girls immediately took heart,
And we became friends.
They changed their minds, and warmed up,
We sang some songs to the guitar
The girls immediately became bolder
And we became friends.
 
How much whorish trash
These girls are wearing..
Clothes, stockings,
golden earrings.
We took it off of them
Until our fingers were tired
Well, now the girls really 'stuck out'
Thus we flaunted them.
We took it off of them
Until our fingers were tired
Well, now the girls really 'stuck out'
Thus we flaunted them.
 
We placed the good girls
Under the christmas tree
And treated them to chocolate and pinecones
The girls immediately became happy
Started to suck, even without chocolate
But they really needed chocolate
As a necessary treat
The girls immediately became happy
Started to suck, even without chocolate
But they really needed chocolate
As a necessary treat
 
We started to lead the girls
In a friendly round dance.
Merrily, merrily
We celebrated the New Year.
Within two weeks we'll need
To buy them some Klaforan among friends (1)
Yes, and the girls were not bored,
They instead had an abortion.
Within two weeks we'll need
To buy them some Klaforan among friends
Yes, and the girls were not bored,
They instead had an abortion.
 

A widow

How can't I have fun and have sadness from any troubles?
My wonderful neighbor died in our house.
He have gone to the other world a few days ago, but his wife remained alone,
She is very nice.
 
Let other men spend money for women everymoment,
While they tell them loving words,
While they drive them into a restaurant, I am fed and drunk for free,
Because I have a very kind widow.
 
If you want seduce a woman, you must come pothouse with her,
Also she can resist you!
My situation is not such, I am fed and drunk for free,
Let my dick be getting up more often.
 
Let other men spend money for women everymoment,
While they tell them loving words,
While they drive them into a restaurant, I am fed and drunk for free,
Because I have a very kind widow.
 
If I am drunk and dirty,
If my mouth is stinking like a bullshit,
She will forgive me this,
Kind widow will warm up, shelter, bathe,
Give me the hair of the dog *, and put to sleep me.
 
Let other men spend dollars for women everymoment,
While they tell them loving words,
While they drive them into a restaurant, I am fed and drunk for free,
Because I have a very kind widow.
 

The w**re

Once I was a poor and unremarkable girl,
Nobody would ever approach me in the street,
But now I am a w**re and every minute
Some wealthy man leads me to the pub.
But now I am a w**re and every minute
Some wealthy man leads me to the pub.
 
For example, common workers have only hands
That are considered as golden(*), they use them to operate machines/tools,
But in my case, I use hands, t**s, va**na and mouth,
And when I am at work - pubic hair in the suds
But in my case, I use hands, t**s, va**na and mouth,
And when I am at work - pubic hair in the suds
 
Before I was poor, drank only moonshines,
I was lonely and didn't know anybody,
Now I am together with Gena, he is incredible,
He is a very good p**p, I pray for him.
Now I am together with Gena, he is incredible,
He is a very good p**p, I pray for him.
 
Formerly I was bi**hy, I ate only canned food,
Drank water after it, not to hiccup,
Now I eat splints and drink only 'Amaretto's
I smoke only 'More' cigarettes, that's the life, the Christ's sake!
Now I eat splints and drink only 'Amaretto's
I smoke only 'More' cigarettes, that's the life, the Christ's sake!
 

Evil night

Evil night, it is certainly evil night tonight,
And bloody moon shines upon us,
We can't sleep tonight with friends.
A circle, and in that circle the star is drawn on the floor,
We'll ask all the questions to the evil tonight, because
 
Evil night, we 100% believe in you
Evil night, show us who is who.
 
That's a girl, she is nice and humble,
She was shy every time,
She would have been an ideal wife.
The spirit started to explain us,
That she is the last w**re,
L**bian, which kind is hard to find,
We are shocked, let's go further.
 
Evil night, we 100% believe in you
Evil night, show us who is who.
 
That's the man, he looks like okay guy,
He was neither greedy, nor harsh,
And everyone liked him always.
The spirit has explained to us,
That he is a f**king f**ot,
That he is b**tard, s**nk and c**d,
Wow wow, solo(*), let's go
 
All is crap, that's my turn,
Hey, poltergeist, tell us who am I,
Looks like I am not greedy and I'm not a pig.
The spirit has explained this way,
That I am f**king as**ole,
How dare you? that's not as it is,
I am normal, how dare you, bastards.
 
Evil night, I'll never believe,
Evil night, nobody believes in you.
 

Dead in the House

A god forsaken village in the forest, damn,
Here, you can be abused by deceased.
They create outrages and snoop at night,
And even in the house, this night, there is no peace for us.
And outside the window the moon is lit and shines on the graveyard,
Our black cat pursed its tail in fear.
And there is a horrible and after-death howl behind the window,
Perhaps the corpses under the earth have lost their peace.
 
Dead in the house, close the mirrors,
Dead in the house is waiting around the corner.
Dead in the house, oh, my,
He craves for your blood, he will get it.
 
Your great-grandmother died this terrible night,
She was very, very wicked witch when she was alive.
Now she is in the coffin and on the table,
And her spirit has long been flying on a broomstick.
We dozed off, grandmother immediately
Fixed upon us her her dead eyes.
From her dead mouth came out big fangs,
Don't touch us, grandmother, we're your great-grandchildren.
 
Dead in the house, close the mirrors,
Dead in the house is waiting around the corner.
Dead in the house, oh, my,
He craves for your blood, he will get it.
 
She will not go to the grave without us,
She will take us there with her.
Through a dream, I hear her get up,
And she comes to me, sprung out her claws.
 
As if we were paralyzed from fear,
She's thrusting her fangs into me now.
I feel she'll leave us here forever,
With you, we'll hang out here until the Judgement day.
 
Dead in the house, close the mirrors,
Dead in the house is waiting around the corner.
Dead in the house, oh, my,
He craves for your blood, he will get it.
 
Dead in the house, close the mirrors,
Dead in the house is waiting around the corner.
Dead in the house, he sneak in somehow,
He craves for your blood, protect yourself, man.
 
Tibor from QS-FB

Cop

I'm not a turner, I'm not a baker,
I'm not a cook, not an assistant professor,
I'm not a janitor, I'm not a locksmith,
I'm a simple Soviet cop.
I work in station
Which calls sobering-up
You plow in factories,
Well, I'm glad to be here.
 
Hey, who's at the door, go out to the toilet one by one.
 
If you're a customer with money,
Didn't pass my day just because,
All pockets inside out,
I'll clean'em all just like that.
After all, one salary is not enough,
Judge, dudes,
I have also whores,
I need moneys too.
 
Hey, who's at the door, go out to the toilet one by one.
 
I'll serve all in the best possible way,
I'll undress, laying down
Let the work is dirty,
But I don't go with the plow.
After all, in our native village
Even if you plows a hundred lands,
You'll not get moneys as much per day,
As I put in my overcoat.
 
Hey, who's at the door, go out to the toilet one by one.
 
Tibor from QS-FB

Local

I live on Waih, believe me, I have no fear,
But from this terrible thought there is a knock in the teeth.
You live on Chizhovka, and you'll not come:
Chizhovskie so messed you up, so you'll not reach the house.
 
Very strange things,
What life brought to,
I can't go to my beloved one,
Can meet on the way, oh
Local.
 
I see you in dreams and grow thin in front of my eyes,
I'd come to you a long time ago, but I'm afraid of being bruised.
I lost weight by deciding for a whole year:
To be on a date with a bruise, or in separation without it.
 
Very strange things,
What life brought to,
I can't go to my beloved one,
Can meet on the way, oh
Local.
 
I figured out how we should be, so that we can't howl in separation -
Better you, my friend, come to me to be friends.
You fly to me with an arrow, but, my love, know
Our local chavs can meet on the way.
 
Very strange things,
What life brought to,
I can't go to my beloved one,
Can meet on the way, oh
Local.
 
Tibor from QS-FB

Cuckoo!

Two Jews sat on a thin branch,
One read the newspaper, another stirred the flour.
Once cuckoo, two cuckoo,
Both of them fucked down in flour. ah-ah
 
Two files're flew, flew on their sides,
One flew to the right, the other looked into the river.
Once cuckoo, two cuckoo,
Both of them fucked down in river. ah-ah
 
Two whales crawled, crawled to America,
One was in the kombinzone, the other broke his arm.
Once cuckoo, two cuckoo,
So you need that, fool. ah-ah
 
Tibor from QS-FB

VCR

Holy s**t, that dream, a video cassette recorder (VCR),
My dude has got it from the crowds,
Bought just for seven thousands (rubles)
He did not eat for a whole year,
He had finally f**ked up.
 
I came to him yesterday to watch till the morning,
Fights, s**, vampires, corpses, Bruce Lee.
I have watched so hard that my mind became malfunctioning,
And I was brought to the mental hospital in the morning.
VCR.
 
First we have watched s** scenes,
My friend was h**ny,
Then he started to bite his nails.
He turned and wheezed, he was angry, he was shouting,
After the movie he was in a 'd**ty' pants.
 
Well, I sat silently, tight in my armchair,
But I kept strong and held me in my arms.
After I have watched it, I could not resist
And f**ked his wife out.
VCR.
 
And then came an action movie, I was 'tired'
And I saw how two unknown people were fighting against each other.
They had provoked me, I had remembered my childhood
And had hit my dude's face.
He granted me with concussion without a word,
And now I smile everyday.
This holy s**t, that dream, video cassette recorder,
F**k the VCR factory.
VCR.
 

Blowie

I was a very honest girl,
Polite and reserved,
My virginity was mine,
My pride, and all that other shit.
 
But I gave in to no one,
Kept myself, much as I could,
Only, at my own cost,
Sex gnawed away at my bullshit.
 
Oh, how I want a real man,
To leave me black and blue,
To caress me everywhere,
But just not clasp at my zipper.
 
But if he really pesters me,
And hints at anything,
I'll tell him 'no,' but, at least,
Agree to a blowie.
 
It's a wonderful word, 'blowie,'
It's a wonderful word, 'blowie,'
It's a wonderful word, 'blowie.'
 
Now I'm getting married soon,
My husband will respect me,
I was just a girl, after all,
I was just protecting my hymen.
 
And girls, listen to what I tell you,
Save yourself for your groom,
Don't agree to that, no,
But, bravely, give him a blowie,
 
Oh-oh!
Yes, It's a wonderful word, 'blowie,'
It's a wonderful word, 'blowie,'
It's a wonderful word, 'blowie.'