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Couldn't breathe

Versions: #1
I’m not fighting a war with you
No, I won’t take part at all
I just want to get as far away as ever can from you
I’m tired of setting your curtains
I have seen how others get hurt
You can’t make me stay
 
You can talk whatever you want about me
And to whomever you want, yeah
I’m no longer afraid of anything
Not the talks, not loneliness
 
I too had feelings
I too had a heart
Eooo
And that ends here now
I too had strength
Just a little
I’m not invisible
I’m still alive
Eooo
I have to leave
Close to you, I just couldn’t breathe
 
Even though you take up all the space
You tell me how I come to ruin it
So, I have come every time you’ve asked
Come to cover up all your tracks
I have learned how to lie
Already when I was young, of course
Hey
Got to repeat the familiar pattern
 
You can talk whatever you want about me
And to whomever you want, yeah
They can believe it if they want to
I’m too tired to explain anything
 
I too had feelings
I too had a heart
Eooo
And that ends here now
I too had strength
Just a little
I’m not invisible
I’m still alive
Eooo
I have to leave
Close to you, I just couldn’t breathe
 
I too, had a heart, heart…
 
I too had feelings
I too had a heart
Eoo
And that ends here now
I too had strength
Just a little
I’m not invisible
I’m still alive
Eoo
I have to leave
Close to you, I just couldn’t breathe
 

Tequila

Versions: #1
By the freight station building
for the posterity
I carve with a knife
on the walls of a a by-gone world
the initials of you and me,
those of the two unwished
Grab on to me, draw starts into eyes
 
Towards the dawn1 we drive
by the shoreline2
through the whole country
Let's drive fast
and not utter a sound
you may pour tequila into my belly button
You're my rising sun
and my only homeland
Let's drive fast
in a motel somewhere you may
pour tequila into my belly button
 
The cliffs will cover me
when I wish to make love to you
I fall asleep to whale-song
and the comfort of your arms.
Trustingly the maimed one
will lie to rest,
your hand still caressing me
 
Towards the dawn we drive
by the shoreline
through the whole country
Let's drive fast
and not utter a sound
you may pour tequila into my belly button
You're my rising sun
and my only homeland
Let's drive fast
in a motel somewhere you may
pour tequila into my belly button
 
Towards the dawn we drive
by the shoreline
through the whole country
Let's drive fast
and not utter a sound
you may pour tequila into my belly button
You're my rising sun
and my only homeland
Drive anywhere
in a motel somewhere you may
pour tequila into my belly button
 
Towards the dawn we drive
by the shoreline
through the whole country
Let's drive fast
and not utter a sound
you may pour tequila into my belly button
You're my rising sun
and my only homeland
Let's drive fast
in a motel somewhere you may
pour tequila into my belly button
 

• 1. lit. morning
• 2. lit. by the beaches

New Dreams

All the catastrophes that you feared
They came true
Came a deluge and came a flash flood
But you still swim
Happened all the classics
And that really drowned ones faith in people
 
You say you can't anymore
But when this is behind
You'll fly to space, baby
 
To me you are a miracle
This is not your final condition
Don't look into the mirror with disgust
From there looks back a beautiful human
You'll travel the earth
And all the planets are for you
Today you don't yet dare go outside
Let's stay renewing your dreams
 
How can in one guys life
All the shit happen
More setbacks
But could the target be someone else for a change
I have seen how you get
hammered into mince on the tatami
 
You say you can't anymore
But when this is behind
You'll fly to space, baby
 
To me you are a miracle
This is not your final condition
Don't look into the mirror with disgust
From there looks back a beautiful human
You'll travel the earth
And all the planets are for you
Today you don't yet dare go outside
Let's stay renewing your dreams
 
Today you don't yet dare go outside
Let's stay renewing your dreams
 
Today you don't yet dare go outside
Let's stay renewing your dreams
 

I don’t have a childhood hero

Versions: #2
I changed my last name back to my father’s name
when my stepdad said I’m not his daughter
Six-year-old, waited for my brothers to come home from school
In the song Agnetha was thanking the music
 
Brothers wete dragged to the town hall
I’m offering a Pectus drop to Paavo
I stayed to play their Atari
because I was left home alone again
 
Under our skin, there’s lizard green
I’m watching the stars from behing the kennels
 
Red teeth from a color tablet
I rip my own faces off of photos
And when I can’t handle the reality
I’ll fall asleep in the closet
There I invent a new world
there I’ll wake in the morning
 
When playing house I’m the family dog
miracle baby, magic son
I’m the santa in penkkarit*
on graduation day I’m working for others
I’ve believed in God
and fucked my cousin
with both I agreed
that this probably won’t continue
 
Oh
my songs
Fly away from here
Oh
Carry on somewhere
when I die
 
Images of pop stars
I don’t remember Tiina Lillak**
I’m not some soldier
I don’t have a childhood hero
Hitting the bottom in cars***
And I’m not some soldier
I don’t have a childhood hero
 
Twelve years old getting my stomach pumped
Learned that I shouldn’t drink this much
Girls don’t act like that
I was taught in school
The patterns of the ceilinh pine panel
resemble magical creatures
 
Of cource I’ll make some mistakes with their upbringing
even tho I lovingly care for my little brothers
Like when I let them watch the Blairwitch Project too early
Look mom
I did leave looking like this
The same goddamn kid
Yes, it’s just me
 
Oh
Carry on somewhere
when i die
 
Images of pop stars
I don’t remember Tiina Lillak**
I’m not some soldier
I don’t have a childhood hero
Hitting the bottom in cars***
And I’m not some soldier
I don’t have a childhood hero
 

Now it's time to go

I don't know if I was made to walk
But when you have to walk, you walk
I don't know if I was made to go
But yet again, now it's time to go
 
I don't know if I was made to fly
Made or not, yet we jump
Now when I can't stay here either
Yet again, now it's time to go
 
Bravery I haven't even heard about
This just a cockroach as it's soul
They move away before they get demolished
Again, now it's time to go
 
Even if I dropped off to the darkness
Even if I couldn't handle love
Even if I couldn't cope with your hatred
 
Now it's time to go
 
Even if I dropped off to the darkness
Even if I couldn't handle love
Even if I couldn't cope with your hatred
 
Now it's time to go
 
I don't know if I dare to love
I let you hurt me
I don't know if I was made to relinquish
But yet again, now it's time to go
 
Am I born to survive?
Where is the creator of this and the reason for all?
What is it to succeed?
Yet again, now it's time to go
 
One day I desided that I will stay up
Do I have to do it alone?
There is a mountain, now climb
Yet again, now it's time to go
 
Even if I dropped off to the darkness
Even if I couldn't handle love
Even if I couldn't cope with your hatred
 
Now it's time to go
 
Even if I dropped off to the darkness
Even if I couldn't handle love
Even if I couldn't cope with your hatred
 
Now it's time to go
 
To my tears and prayers
If they were answered, they got cancelled
If you follow me, you see the shards
To my path have they fallen down
When things happen to me as they happen
 
Now it's time to go
 
Even if I dropped off to the darkness
Even if I couldn't handle love
Even if I couldn't cope with your hatred
 
Now it's time to go